


A Luthor's Lament and a Super's Trepidation

by Elsiesnowwolf



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: (later) - Freeform, Angst, F/F, Kara Danvers Doesn't Know that Lena Luthor Knows, Lena Luthor Knows Kara Danvers Is Supergirl, PTSD, Protective Kara Danvers, Red Kryptonite Kara Danvers, Romance, SuperCorp
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-23
Updated: 2020-07-23
Packaged: 2021-03-05 06:21:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25460011
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elsiesnowwolf/pseuds/Elsiesnowwolf
Summary: Lena Luthor has lost many people in her life, her mother, her father, and in a way, her brother. The only person she had yet to lose, was one Kara Danvers. Even though she knew the blonde’s secret, she was going to let Kara come to her. But it weighed heavily on her to think that Kara did not trust her enough to tell her. Would Kara ever come forward, or would she be forced to lament another friendship ruined by her name? What Kara doesn’t know, however, is that Lena has her own secrets.
Relationships: Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor
Comments: 3
Kudos: 54





	1. Let your brilliance shine through the disguise

**Author's Note:**

> AN: Hi everyone! It’s been quite a while, I know, and I’ll be getting back to What To Expect VERY soon, just not in the way you may expect. My writing style has significantly changed since 2015 (crazy to think of all that’s happened since then) and I think the story deserves a rewrite with more detail and attention, so to give everyone an example of my new writing style, I present to you this new SuperCorp fanfic. However, if you guys don’t want a rewrite, but just a continuation with the new writing style, that would be fine as well. Let me know! This doesn’t really follow canon, as I don’t really watch the show in depth anymore, but I hope you enjoy it regardless. This story will mostly be under Lena’s POV, however there will be Kara-centric chapters as well.

Chapter 1: Let your brilliance shine through the disguise 

The warmth radiating off of Kara Danvers smile was infectious, and despite the long day Lena had had, she found herself responding in kind when her friend strides into her office, a small bag in her hand, the smell of sweets filling the air.

“You’re terrible for my diet, you know,” is the first thing the youngest Luthor states, smiling more when the blonde gently laughs.

“If it weren’t for me, Lena, you’d live off of _kale_ ,” she scrunches up her nose, lightly adjusting her glasses and she sets the bag on Lena’s desk. The brunette stands, walking around to softly hug her friend in greeting. “Kale isn’t that bad, Kara, you just have some weird aversion to greens.” Lena responds, smiling when Kara wraps her arms around her in a strong hug – but she knows the hug is measured, knowing that Kara has to watch her strength, and it makes her long for a _real_ hug from the girl, but knows it’ll probably never happen.

“Yeah because like, who would live off _kale_ when you could have pizza. Or potstickers. Oh! Or—” She laughs and quickly covers Kara’s mouth softly with her hand. “Not all of us have your scarily amazing metabolism, Kara. Some of us have a few curves they need to keep in check or get rid of,” she says with light flirtatious tone, one that doesn’t go unnoticed by Kara, who lightly blushes, stammering in the adorable way she does when she’s embarrassed.   
“I..well…I think you look great,” she murmurs gently, and Lena arches a gentle brow, leaning back to softly cross her arms.

“Thank you, Kara, however, you’re a biased party.” She chuckles, gently turning around to open the bag, making a soft, excited sound when she sees a donut, and gently pulls one out, still remembering the first time Kara had brought her donuts. 

_“You like donuts, right?”  
“Well, I am human.” _

It makes Lena smile fondly, taking a bite of the regular glaze while Kara reaches in for her signature pink frosted donut, the two sharing a smile as they walk to the couch to sit down, and Lena lets out a tired sigh. “I hate that I haven’t really been able to see you lately. L-Corp has had quite a large amount of good press lately, and we’re using the momentum to push forward new green projects.”

The reporter in Kara immediately lights up, turning toward Lena in excitement, clearly wanting an inside scoop that only she was privy to.   
“I’ll tell you more when I can, Kara,” she says with a chuckle, tearing off a piece of her donut, eating it gingerly with a smile at Kara’s pout. “Don’t give me that look, my investors will murder me if I let something slip out too early. But the second I have the go-ahead to say anything, you’ll be the first to know, like always.” She reaches over, lightly squeezing Kara’s knee with a gentle grin.   
“Okay, okay, I won’t push, even though literally every instinct is telling me to,” Kara laughs gently, pushing up her glasses after taking a bite of her own donut. The two fall into a comfortable silence, something that usually irks Lena, enjoying some sort of background noise, whether it be music or a TedTalk turned down low in the background, or even just the clacking of her keyboard as she works. But with Kara, it was different. A _lot_ of things were different with Kara. No one else was given the go-ahead to waltz into her office whenever they so pleased, no one was allowed to get so close to Lena, to see all the cracks in her armor, to actually hold and comfort her in times of need. _No_ , Lena thinks, _no one will ever be like Kara._ The thought makes her pause, turning toward Kara gently, and she hums softly. “Tell me, Kara, do you know how to play chess?”   
“Even if I did, I’ve seen your trophies, I know not to go against you,” Kara laughs, but there’s a type of resignation in her voice, like all she wants to do is admit that she does know, but is holding back, and for once, Lena calls her out on it.   
  


“You know, I hate it when you reject your own intelligence, Kara.”

Kara is caught off guard. “I’m not sure I know what you mean?”   
  


“In your own right, Kara, you’re a genius. You can string words together in a way that would make Shakespeare blush, and I’ve read a few of your science articles, especially when we released info about our new solar panels last year,” Lena smiles gently. She knew there were things Kara couldn’t tell her, but that didn’t mean she wouldn’t try to give the blonde an opening to be herself.

Kara nervously fidgets beside her, teeth sinking into her bottom lip in a way that makes Lena’s abdomen coil slightly with need before she’s pushing that thought down into a tiny box in the back of her mind, and the blonde finally relents, murmuring softly around her donut. “Yes, I know how to play.”

That makes Lena grin, and she lightly stands, walking over to a drawer in the corner of her office, bringing out a glass chess table with its pieces, walking back over to the couch, setting the board between them. “Indulge me? I haven’t had a worthy opponent in quite some time.” She grins softly, and smiles as Kara starts to set up the board, concentration already on her features, and she aches to reach across them to soothe the furrow between her brows, but she holds back, of course, like always.

She lets Kara make the first move, and she regrets it _instantly_ in the best way possible, the blonde grinning at her excitedly, glasses slipping low on her nose, donut in her free hand, and for the first time, it looks like Kara isn’t holding back with something, and it makes Lena’s chest swell with pride.

In that moment, Lena sees the _real_ Kara. Not the girl who hides behind false clumsiness, cardigan sweaters and glasses, but a girl who lost her entire civilization and was forced to be someone she wasn’t, and is now getting an opportunity, no matter how small, to let some of her brilliance shine through.

And the love she feels for her best friend in that moment makes her _ache._ It weighs heavily in her chest, that she can’t confront Kara, to beg her friend to let her help take the weight carrying on her people’s legacy, of protecting the world, off her shoulders, even minimally. She had to let Kara come to her, or risk ruining their entire friendship by knowing she knew Kara’s secret from that second meeting.   
_“If you have a parking ticket I can have it validated for you!”  
“No-no-no, that’s fine, I flew here – on..on a uh..bus.” _

She had known by looking at the furrow of that strong brow, realizing the small scar there, the beautiful blue of her eyes, the soft smirk of her lips, that Kara Danvers was Supergirl. How anyone, truly, was fooled by it, Lena had no idea, but she kept that to herself, of course, like many things. She turns her attention to the board, allowing concentration to furrow her own brow now, and she moves a pawn forward.

*~*~*~*~*~*

It only takes thirty minutes for Kara to win, and Lena stares at her in shock, looking at her poor king that Kara had decided to knock over with her piece, even though it wasn’t needed as she triumphantly says “Checkmate, Lena.”

“How dare you, he’s already dead, Kara,” Lena chastises with a slight huff, and Kara laughs, the sound from deep in her chest, full of joy, and Lena smiles deeply, only falling deeper in love with Kara, and just for a moment, she lets the warmth of that love take over, lets it relax her, her heartbeat thundering loudly in her ears as she watches her best friend re-arrange the pieces, as if a metaphor for Kara putting Lena’s heart back together after it had been broken so many times.

In that moment, Lena knows, without a shadow of a doubt, that _no one_ will ever be like Kara Danvers. This time the thought doesn’t make her pause, it makes her reach across the board, and softly grab Kara’s hand to gently squeeze it as she whispers, “Thank you, Kara. For being my friend.”   
Kara blinks in surprise, turning her hand over to squeeze Lena’s hand in kind, whispering back, “Never thank me for that, Lena. Never thank me for doing something as natural as breathing.” The firmness in her words nearly steals Lena’s breath straight from her lungs, but she just softly bites her lip before smiling, the sunset spilling in from her tall windows making Kara positively glow, radiating natural beauty under the warm glow of the yellow sun.

“Round two?” Kara asks softly, looking deep into Lena’s eyes, and the brunette notices that the blue seems a bit darker, her irises just a bit larger than normal, and she lets out a gentle breath, finally pushing down the love she has for her best friend into yet another box, and she smiles softly.   
“I get the first move this time.” Lena smirks, moving a piece forward without hesitation.

_Maybe one day,_ Lena thinks quietly, _maybe one day, Kara, you’ll let me through your armor, as well._


	2. The Warmth that Rain Brings

Chapter 2: The Warmth that Rain Brings

It’s a rare, rainy day in National City, and Lena took great pleasure in it, watching the droplets of rain race down the large glass windows of her apartment, a book in her lap, music playing on shuffle in the background – a playlist Kara had made her for her birthday last year, something that had surprised her so intensely she had nearly cried at the reveal.

_They were alone in her apartment, everyone else had left for the night, but Kara had stayed behind, shuffling around nervously. Lena noticed, her head softly tilting. “Kara, are you alright?”_

_“No-, I mean yes, yes I’m fine, I just have one more gift to give you.” She smiles shyly, reaching in her bag for a USB drive, softly handing it to Lena.  
“What’s on it?” She asks gently, caressing the small stick with her thumb in question, and Kara gently takes it from her, walking to her computer to plug it in. “It’s a playlist, but there’s a link to it on Spotify as well, that I can manually update. It’ll update on the flash drive, too, though, even if you don’t have internet to access it.” She rambles on, quickly playing it with a blush adorning her high cheek bones, fidgeting nervously with her glasses. _

_Tears flood Lena’s eyes. They had only known each other for barely year, but Kara had paid so much attention to her personal interests in the few times Lena let herself ramble to actually put together a playlist for her.  
“K-..Kara..” she gasps out, walking to her friend to wrap her arms around her in a hug, as strong as she could give the girl, who returns it in earnest, as much as she can let herself, anyway.   
“Most of them are songs I _know _you like, but a few I attribute to you, and our friendship, and just songs that make me think of you in some way, or songs I think you might just like,” she rambles again, shyly hiding her face in Lena’s neck to hide her blush, and Lena only squeezes her tighter, whispering against her ear, “Thank you, Kara, I love it, I love_ you _, I don’t deserve your friendship,” she grips the back of Kara’s soft t-shirt, and Kara lets herself laugh, whispering back,  
“Lena, you deserve the world, and one day, I’ll figure out how to give it to you.”_

She smiles fondly at the memory, realizing a new song is playing, and Kara must have recently added it.

_When all of your flaws, and all of my flaws are laid out one by one…_ She doesn’t recognize the lyrics, gently bringing out her phone, recording part of it, and sends it to Kara, asking under it

LL: What’s the title of this? It’s new.

The response comes a minute later, the music continuing in the background _You have always your flaws upon your sleeve, and I have always buried them deep beneath the ground…_

KD: It’s _Flaws_ by Bastille. I know you liked Pompeii, so I wanted to introduce you to more of his music. I added a few more as well from the Bad Blood album, and a few others.

There’s a slew of emojis added that Lena’s phone doesn’t recognize, and she makes a point to ask Kara to send her whatever emoji package she uses in order to actually see them at a later date.

Another text comes in from Kara after Lena doesn’t reply.

KD: Are you enjoying the rain? I know it reminds you of Ireland.

She smiles fondly, caressing the screen of her phone lightly, sighing softly.

LL: I do. And it couldn’t be more apt, with what day it is.

She worries her bottom lip softly, taking a shaky breath, looking over at one her bookshelves, seeing an old picture of her birth mother holding her beside one of her mother’s favorite books, and the ache in her chest returns, tears springing forth. She wishes she could have met Kara, but the blonde’s words echo in her head.   
_“I believe everything happens for a reason, Lena. Even burnt bridges have an ending you must get to first to light the match. No matter how painful it is.”_ She thinks of her life with the Luthor’s, and how it led her to Kara, and she can’t be as sad anymore.

KD: Your mom’s birthday, right?

It makes her smile, knowing that Kara remembered after only one conversation.   
LL: Yes. She would have loved to see the rain like this. It’s different here in National City, but no less beautiful.

KD: She would have been proud of you. I hope you know that.

A surprised sob leaves Lena’s throat, and she’s quick to cover her mouth, even in the privacy of her penthouse, tears brimming in her green eyes as she shakily puts her phone down. The need for Kara to meet her birth mother only grows tenfold then, and she’s left hugging the warm blanket Kara had gotten her that Christmas after she had a bad cold, and she buries her nose in the softness of it, and she sighs gently, wiping at her eyes, texting Kara back quickly.

LL: I hope so. Thank you, Kara.

KD: I seriously should make a no thanking me rule.

LL: If that’s the case, I want joint custody of the playlist.   
KD: Never, that’s for you only.   
LL: Then I suppose I’ll have to make one for you on my own.

She chuckles softly. She had asked Kara several times to allow her to edit the playlist, wanting to put songs on there for Kara as well, but the blonde always refused. She smiles deeply with The Cranberries start to play, and it pangs more in her chest at the loss of her mother, who deeply loved the band and had played them for Lena from the moment she was born, according to her mother. She closes her eyes, taking in the rain, the sounds of the soft music, and in that moment, it only feels like one thing is truly missing from this peaceful moment.

Kara.

There’s a sudden, gentle knock on her door, and she stands, already knowing who it would be, only one person was allowed up to her penthouse, and she opens the door with a soft smile.   
“I’m starting to think you know when your presence is missed.” Lena says, opening her arms for a hug, and Kara steps into her arms as if they fit together like puzzle pieces, softly squeezing her friend, something pressing into her back from Kara’s hands. She pulls back gently, smiling slowly, sighing gently.  
“Plumerias.” She takes them from Kara softly, the blonde gently smiling, closing the door behind her. “Thank you, Kara, they’re lovely.” She walks over to the bookshelf, softly placing them beside her mother’s picture. Kara follows her, lightly touching the photo’s frame, something Lena would usually never let happen, and Kara seems to be concentrating, as if speaking in her head, and Lena stays quiet, and Kara turns to her after a moment, hugging her friend again tightly. “I’m here for you, always, Lena.”

“I know, Kara, thank you.” She whispers, resting her head on Kara’s shoulder for a moment, staring out at the rain covering National City, and she feels at peace.

“Wanna watch a movie and order take out that’s seriously bad for us?”   
“Can I order a salad?” She asks with a small arch of her brow.   
“Only if you have some potstickers with it.” Kara grins down at her, and she realizes, that Kara is actually a good bit taller than her without her heels, and it’s surprising. Kara is dressed in a soft cotton V-neck and jeans, and Lena herself is in more casual wear, a sweater from her college days and yoga pants, and she feels horribly under-dressed, even if it is just Kara.

“Deal.”

Kara makes an excited sound, already calling her favorite Chinese place, walking over to the couch with Lena. The brunette lets out a surprised sound when Kara pulls her against her sound, wrapping the blanket around them and turning on the television, picking out a movie on Netflix.

It’s the first time she doesn’t feel overwhelmed on her mother’s birthday, and it’s all thanks to Kara.

Once again, her love grows for the girl. The Girl of Steel.

She rests her head on Kara’s shoulder, once again thinking, _One day she’ll let me in, and when she does, I’ll be there to piece her together, just like she has with me._


End file.
